Care for the Demanding

We had a Tom Cat named Boots, he is a roamer, we are not sure where or if he is at this moment.  We also had a stray, Little Bit, who adopted us and had two litters of kittens before she died defending the second set from a pack of stray dogs.  Of her litters of kittens, there is still one that stays around our house.  It is not a domesticated cat, it will not let us come near it and hides when it sees us.  However, this cat expects -- demands -- a bowl of food in the morning, and we feed it.  Admittedly, I get frustrated that this cat, to whom we have given ardent devotion in the form of free shelter and free food does not return that devotion by allowing us to pet or play with it.  This cat is far from its parents -- Boots would let you pick him up and carry him anywhere.  He liked to climb in laps and nap or just be petted.  Little Bit was wild when she came to us, but warmed up to us and would rub against us and came to the point where she would climb up in our laps if we were sitting on a step or on the ground.

This particular offspring of Boots and Little Bit remind me of a passage in Judges 2:7-11.  Here the penman records that as long as Joshua and the elders that were with him remained the people were faithful to God, but as time went on there arose a generation that did not know Joshua or those elders, and did not remember what God had done in delivering the people from Egypt, through the desert, and into a land ready for them.  This group forsook God for idols and did what was right in their own eyes.

Concerning this propensity of people someone said, "We are always and only ONE GENERATION away from apostasy."  Maybe that is why God told the people in Deut 6:4-9, "Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates."

Parents we need to teach our children about God and remind them of the blessings that are in Christ.
Parents we must train our children to be godly in their lives while they are young.
Parents we should nurture them (lead them) in the Light.

What do you do to help your children become more and more like Christ?

Scott

Top Ten Signs a Teenage Male is in Your House

This summer our son, Andrew, turns 13. This seems to be a turning point year for him.  He is learning to play guitar, he played Jr High Basketball, and is currently working out for football.  In the past he participated in quiz bowl events in Elementary and earned a 1st Degree Level 3 BlackBelt in TaeKwondo, but this is his first year to venture into major sports.  Amy and I realize we have a budding teenager in the house.  Here are the Top Ten Observations from the Home Front in Oakman, Alabama:

10. There are always piles of clothes to wash.
9. There is never enough food in the house.
8. Football is king.
7. You hear an instrumental cover of "Stairway to Heaven" coming from his room, when the radio is off.
6. You are accustomed to the clanging sound of free weights.
5. Fingerprints appear high above ALL doorways.
4. Two words - Body Spray!
3. The refrigerator is always open.
2. Getting his hair cut (combed) is an ordeal.
1. You learn sarcasm is a way to communicate love.

Those of you who have older sons, let me know: What are some signs I missed?  What can I look forward too?
Scott

Raising Great Kids!

(At left: My son Andrew and his cousin Katy explore a drainage ditch in Grayson, KY)

Paul tells parents, " . . . do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." Eph 6:4 (English Standard Version)

HOW can we do this?
I find a method in the imagery of the words of the Psalmist “Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.” Psalm 127:3-5.
Bow season begins this weekend in Alabama, so shooting skills are on my mind. When using a bow, there are four principles to a successful shot. These principles apply to raising great kids:

1. The Direction of the arrow is pointed is important. Where am I pointing my children? Toward the things of the world or toward the things of God (2 Cor 4:16ff)
2. The Strength of the pull on the bow-string is important. How much influence do I have on my children? Am I using the opportunities given me to give them strength to follow through with faith?
3. The Timing of release is important. Sometimes we push our children to grow up too fast. When children are "dating" at when they are barely out of diapers, we create problems for the future. Allow them to be kids. Do not release them to the temptations of the world before they are ready
4. The Accuracy of Aim is important. Know where you are pointing. Aim high. Point them to God and release when they are ready.

Have a great day!
Scott

Larry and Lecil

This morning halfway through my walk I stopped at the local Veterans' Memorial and talked with Larry and Lecil. They have been friends since childhood and now are retired from underground mining. They had great stories to tell and some good advice to share. Their advice had to do with work and what they considered a dying work ethic.

For Larry and Lecil life was hard as they were growing up. Their parents worked at a job all day and in the field all afternoon and every weekend just to scratch out a living. They had it a little better than their parents. UMWA made certain that miners were taken care of. They gardened in the afternoons and on weekends to supplement their diet with fresh vegetables and to put some pack for the winter. Store-bought stuff just isn't as good. What they see today in their children's generation (and I am the same age as their children) is laziness. We have a good paying job, many of us sit at desks, then we go home to climate controlled houses and watch TV, we rarely go outside, we pay someone to tend our yards, we buy market fresh vegetable at the store or from a weather-beaten wearied farmer on the side of the road. Larry and Lecil's concern is about what we will do if: What will our generation do if the economy continues to slide? Do we have the skills or the desire to labor for our needs and not our desires? They shared some advice with me that I am taking to heart:

1. "Work the land." Grow a garden, not just peas to attract the deer, but vegetables for your family.
2. "Don't be idle." When you get home from your job, keep working, inside and outside the house.
3. "Find something constructive to do." They are planning to replace the clutch on Larry's tractor this weekend.
4. "If you stop working you die early." When you retire, don't sit around, get busy. Their plan for today was to mow the grass, trim the landscaping, and weed-eat around the Memorial. They also planned along with other retiree's to poor concrete, and set up a miniature (8 ft tall) Statue of Liberty on a five foot pedestal next to the Memorial.
5. "Teach your children to think for themselves." Do not do for them what they can do for themselves.

Lots to think about . . .

Scott

Top Ten Verses About Fatherhood

From the home office in Oakman, Alabama we have a top ten list of Bible verses concerning fathers, and a comment or two as to how we can learn from them . . .

10. Grandchildren are the crown of the aged, and the glory of children is their fathers. (Pro 17:6) I know grown children whose fathers were not the best of men, but still love their "Daddy." There may be something to that old cliche'; "Blood is thicker than water."

9. The father of the righteous will greatly rejoice; he who fathers a wise son will be glad in him. (Pro 23:24) As the father of a young man who currently seems to have his head on straight, I will amen this. When we raise young men and women who are responsible adults how can our hearts not swell at their successes.

8. Besides this, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us and we respected them. (Heb 12:9a). The wise man wrote in Proverbs that sparing discipline (the rod) spoils the child. As fathers we must discipline our children so that they will learn to be righteous, responsible adults.

7. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. (Eph 6:4) When we discipline, remember that there is a fine line between correction and abuse. Make certain your children understand the purpose of each punishment. One friend calls his discipline plan, "MLE" - Meaningful Learning Experiences.

6. Immediately the father of the child cried out and said, "I believe; help my unbelief!" (Mk 9:24) To be a good father, we must be faithful to our heavenly Father. Take time to reflect on and maybe even pray the plea of the father in Mark 9.

5. For God commanded, 'Honor your father and your mother,' and, 'Whoever reviles father or mother must surely die.' (Mat 15:4). This one is to remind not only children to honor their parents but to remind those of us who are fathers to live in a way to make honoring you easy for your children. Do not teach one thing and live the opposite. Also remember that you are a son of your parents, model the honor you want from your children.

4. 'Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? (Mat 19:5) There comes a time to leave home. Raise your children to leave, and if you are an adult still living at home, or married and still trying to "cling" to your parents. Let go. You have a family of your own to care for. Do not neglect your parents, but do not neglect your wife and children either.

3. Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. (Mat 10:37) Now I really start sounding like a preacher. Love your parents, but love God more.

2. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him. (Mat 6:8) You and I as fathers are imperfect. Sometimes there are things that my son wants or needs that I am unaware of. Not God! He knows our needs and longs to bless us in fulfilling them.

1. Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful. (Lk 6:36) This is my goal. Make it yours as well. Be the kind of father to your children that God is to you.

Successfully Raising Children

"Behold children are a heritage from the Lord,

The fruit of the womb a reward.
Like arrows in the hand of a warrior
are the children of one's youth.
Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them!"
Psalm 127:3-5 (ESV)

"Like arrows in the hands of a warrior." What a great statement! A well-skilled archer has effective aim. We have a few avid bow hunters in our Church family, I try, but others put me to shame. They practice, study methods, upgrade equipment, and are able to be on target. Me not so much. I will get out one day before the season starts, dust off my bow, find all my arrows and take a few shots. No wonder my freezer stays empty. I neglect four basic rules of archery:
1) The Direction I point the arrow is important,
2) The Strength of the pull has effect,
3) Properly Timing the Release is valuable, and
4) Accuracy in Aiming is vital.

Apply these to raising children and you understand more about what the Psalmist has in mind.
1) What Direction am I pointing my children in?
2) What Influence (Pull) am I giving them with my lifestyle?
3) Do I let go (Release) them into situations (or expose them to certain things of the world) before they are ready? Or am I hanging on too long?
4) What are my goals (where am I Aiming) for me and my children?

Paul tells fathers (and mothers by default), " . . . do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." (Eph 6:4)

Here are a list of Parental Rules to Model and to Teach so we can be skilled archers.
1) Put purity above pleasure.
2) Place others before yourself.
3) Be more industrious and less lazy.
4) As an adult be more mature and less childish.
5) Demonstrate service over power.
6) Be Christ-like.

** in the photo Scott McCown with younger brother Charles in front, older brother: Doug McCown holding cousin Michelle, cousin Michael McCown. Taken in Chesapeake, Ohio circa 1976 -77.